06 August 2011 - by ~ 1 Comment

Momentary 45

Turning 45 the other day and beating Duchenne muscular dystrophy to the punch one more time has definitely given me an extreme sense of satisfaction. Again, I managed to bob and weave my way around this killer of a disease, and the grand feeling of accomplishment never gets old, even at my age. Score another round for me. Score another round in honor of my brother, Joseph, and all the other boys and men taken before me. Score another one for the entire Duchenne community. And score one for survival itself! The longer I am able to fight, the more rounds I win, and the more I am reminded to appreciate life and take each day as it comes.

This particular birthday also served as a strong kick in the pants and call to stop my impatient mind from thinking way too far ahead. Duchenne reality denies me the luxury of living in terms of years, months, weeks or days. Heck, with the shape I’m in, even hours and minutes are questionable. I am dealing solely in moments now, and my goal is to maintain my relentless desire to seize every single one of them!

You see, moments accumulate and grow into futures, and futures comprise lifetimes. By focusing on moments, I can relish in looking back on them from a future that was never promised. I remember being a mere teenager and dreaming of a future. Well, I nearly lost my life quite a few times since then, but I have survived through it all to get here. This is where I wasn’t supposed to be, but somehow I made it! This is the future, and I am fortunate enough to be sitting here – far beyond my life expectancy projected by the so-called experts – and recalling 45 years worth of moments.

Enjoying a future sure is nice, but I will continue racking up the moments, even with Duchenne breathing down my neck. I know that while this disease will ultimately steal the rest of my future one of these years, it will not be able to erase the moments that define me. And I intend to keep dreaming, doing, achieving and living because the future is fleeting fast, and the way I see it, 46 is only moments away!

  • Debbie Mahoney

    😆 Great attitude! Bless you!